Nurturing relationships are critical to our well-being.
We all want to freely engage with our partners; to encourage and support each other to become our best selves, and be open to the good that exists in our relationships. But often, as we struggle to connect deeply with one another, we end up creating a world of hurt for ourselves and those we love.
We can all use help understanding our own negative triggers; learning to read each other’s signals, and developing the skills we need to create nurturing relationships.
But rarely are we taught how to be in relationship with others, or how to deal effectively with the inevitable conflicts that are bound to come up – and will not go away by themselves.
The only way to truly resolve problems within our relationships is to find ways to deal respectfully and compassionately with one another as we seek solutions. And whatever’s causing the problems, it’s far better to seek solutions together – and to do it sooner than later.
COUPLES COUNSELING CAN HELP
Making the choice to seek therapy is often a scary first step that involves admitting things are not perfect in your partnership. Both partners must be willing to actively participate in addressing the issues and concerns that are preventing them from experiencing the relationship they want.
TEN COMMON REASONS TO SEEK COUPLES COUNSELING
Has the rhythm of your day-to-day life become increasingly conflict-oriented? Maybe they're just “small” arguments, or maybe the blowouts are huge, leaving increasingly more drama in their wake. Either way, the increasing pattern of conflict indicates significant problems under the surface that aren’t being dealt with.
One of the most common reasons for seeking couple therapy is a breach of trust stemming from infidelity in the form of a sexual or emotional affair; or a series of lies/deceptions. Rebuilding trust is always easier in a forum where both parties are free to express their vulnerability.
Maybe overt conflict is not a problem, but you constantly feel ignored or misunderstood. You don’t have a good understanding of what's happening with your partner emotionally; he or she might as well be a stranger. A skilled counselor can help you build the tools you need to improve the ways you connect, hear, and understand each other.
Couples therapy is useful not just for solving problems, but also for identifying them. You know something in the dynamics of your marriage has changed, but you just can’t put your finger on it. You’re not as comfortable with your partner as you used to be, or you find yourself chronically resentful, but you're not really sure why. These are early signs that your interactions are turning unhealthy or dysfunctional.
If you want to find out more about how couples therapy can help you better understand yourself, strengthen your connection to each other, and build a relationship that can bring lasting, positive changes in your lives; I invite you to connect with me to schedule a free 30-minute consultation. I can answer any questions you might have and see if we’re a good fit to help you find your better selves.